The Rumbler
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
The Rumbler can never be revealed, but his personality can be.
Given a blood sample, a strand of hair, a floppy disk and a signature, a computer Televac was able to produce the personality analysis of The Rumbler.
Listed below is the binary code taken from his double helix and transferred to human terminolodgy. In ALL CAPS you will find the computers dictation afterwhich the Rumbler's second assistant has secretated and typed stories or ideas as they relate to the computer's assumptions. When you comment immediately after reading this post, be sure to give gratitude to the Rumbler's return as it has been too long since we have heard the horn blow, too long since his words have rung into the hearts of man and too long since the unsaid has gone unspoken.
beep beep bdlloo(70's computer special effects noises)
"RUMBLER PERSONALITY ANALYSIS"
ksshshs >> kkkkkkkk >> bong - bong (modem sounds)
- YOU LIKE HAVING THE LAST WORD AND THE LAST LAUGH
- not true
- YOU ARE GENERALLY EASY TO GET ALONG WITH
- yes, this is true
- YOU CAN COPE WITH DIFFICULT JOBS<>
- one time my dog, Tanzy, was hyperventilating because of the thunder, I did not have the proper training to cope with that.
- YOU LIKE TO SET YOUR OWN PACE AND LIMITS IN LIFE
- I figure if I knowingly eat my way towards heart disease then I won't be shocked when it kills me
- IT IS YOUR NATURE TO FIGHT DEFEAT
- HA! I kill defeat
- YOU LIKE YOUR FRIENDSHIP TO BE APPRECIATED
- I keep my friends close and my enemies closer
- P.E. #1 - gingivitis
- YOU'RE AN OPTIMIST WHO LIKES TO BE THE LEADER OF THE PACK
- depends on the pack, a six pack - yes, the Wolf Pack (WCW reference) - yes,
- YOU ARE USUALLY FAITHFUL AND CONSTANT
- Like alpha centauris B
- YOU ARE RELIABLE, HONEST AND OTHERS DEPEND ON YOU
- FIBS don't win friends; my word is my bond
- YOU HAVE A REAL DESIRE FOR KNOWLEDGE AND LEARN EASILY
- I speak java
- YOU DEVOTE YOUR ENERGIES TO WORTHWHILE ACTIVITIES
- True, activities would include:
- Sci-fi book clubs
- Chess
- Internet dating (strictly gChat, and she knows who she is)
- plastic bottle collecting
- vacuuming
- YOU CAN HANDLE ANY EMERGENCY AND NEVER ADMIT DEFEAT
- One time I was on a trip with Spencer and Allison Davis (the parents of Owen Judd, my godson) and we ran over a tire on the Oakland bridge and were high-centered in the left lane during rush hour. I instantly knew we were going to die or receive whiplash, and it was in that moment that I remembered hearing that drunk drivers always survive crashes because they are incoherent and their body in limp and non-responsive. So I decided that in order to survive I must go completely limp, it worked and the emergency was well-handled and I never had to admit defeat.
There you have it, now you all know the Rumbler's true personality. Welcome back to the Rumbler's blog.